Thought for the Week

Timothy D. Stein, MFT, CSAT

December 25, 2017

He looks up at the sky.  And a voice says “My dear, everyone makes mistakes.  You’re forgiven, but I cannot force that forgiveness on you.  It’s your choice.” –Paulo Coelho

Every good sponsor will have the addict start their Step 8 list of people to make amends to with “yourself.”  While taking responsibility for the impact your choices and behaviors have had on yourself is important, there is also the issue of forgiveness.  Forgiveness is not absolution.  It does not take responsibility off your shoulders.  Forgiveness acknowledges the harms done while allowing energy previously connected to wounding to now be used for healing and growth.  Connecting with something larger than yourself is the pathway to forgiveness.  The questions is, will you accept the forgiveness that is offered?

When have I rejected forgiveness?  How has rejecting forgiveness impacted my behaviors, interactions, and relationships?  What gifts await me as I hold responsibility and accept forgiveness?