Thought for the Week

Timothy D. Stein, MFT, CSAT

November 11, 2013

Even if I don’t get what I want from a conversation, I find out who they are.

There are two levels to every conversation.  The obvious level is what we are talking about and, at times, what I am trying to get (agreement, acceptance, connection, acknowledgement, etc.).  The underlying level is what I am finding out about the other person (and what they are finding out about me).  Regardless of whether I get what I want from the conversation, I am still able to find out who the other person is.  In terms of long-lasting relationships (business, friendship, or romantic), this information is often significantly more valuable.

Am I only focusing on what I want from a conversation?  What information is waiting for me if I pay attention to what others are showing me about themselves through our conversations?